There’ll come a day when life tests you, even “tumbles in” on you, as described by the writer of Proverbs 29:1 (The Message). I don’t like things tumbling in on me. I don’t like being tested. And I especially don’t like to fail. But it’s usually neither tumbling nor failure that cripples me, but the fear of failing.
It’s the fear that drives me to push away what matters most when life feels out of control. I’m afraid of being considered a fraud, a boy who has been pretending to be a man. A father who wants to be the world’s best Dad, but feels like the worst. A professional, one mistake away from a major business screw-up. A husband of sixteen years, who still rushes out last-minute for a Valentine’s Day gift and the one remaining bouquet of wilted roses—nobody will know, right? So I cling to that which anesthetizes my fears. My hands reach for any illusion that makes me believe I’m still in control, that I’m somehow immune to a personal meltdown of disappointment.
…to read the rest of this post, please click here for Day 29 of Proverbs at Goforth’s Journal. (post is listed below a read-through of Proverbs Chapter 29)
Thanks to writer and friend from the Pacific Northwest Chris Goforth for posting today’s story! If you want to take a trip through the real, check out Goforth’s Journal and follow Chris @pacnwdadof6 on Twitter.